Matthew 14 is one of the more intriguing chapters in the Bible. Here Jesus performs miracle upon miracle; however, the context in which he performed these miracles is woefully ignored.
Yes, Jesus would feed many. Sick would touch his garments and find healing - he would later even walk on water; but before he performed these marvels, Christ would lose his dear messenger John in the most macabre way. Herod hated John the Baptist. His miracles and message made Herod seem surprising human to the Jews and took away from his powerful aura as leader. Though Herod would happily had taken John's life - he knew how popular and regarded John was among his own people and the uproar he'd create were he to take away the greatest prophet to have walked the earth.
As luck would have it though, at least in Herod's mind, this happened,
MAT 14:6-12 NIV
On Herod’s birthday the daughter of Herodias danced for the guests and pleased Herod so much that he promised with an oath to give her whatever she asked. Prompted by her mother, she said, “Give me here on a platter the head of John the Baptist.” The king was distressed, but because of his oaths and his dinner guests, he ordered that her request be granted and had John beheaded in the prison. His head was brought in on a platter and given to the girl, who carried it to her mother. John’s disciples came and took his body and buried it. Then they went and told Jesus.
Imagine how this news altered Christ day, mood-his mental well being. John was the ultimate ambassador. He knew his place and lived only to fulfill his calling.
John 1:7-8 NIV
He came as a witness to testify concerning that light, so that through him all might believe. He himself was not the light; he came only as a witness to the light.
The news of John's death - the manner of his death specifically- made for immense discouragement, maybe even depression in the Christos. To not allow this thought, in my mind, is to deny the 100% humanity of Christ. He had lost his messenger, his predecessor- He was crestfallen, downcast, depressed at least in my mind.
What happened next proves the challenge handling John's death was for Jesus. The Savior himself needed the saving grace of alone time, where he could cry and scream angrily to rhe heavens. He needed time to ask his Father why he'd allow this saint of saints John to be beheaded and have his head handed to evil Herod on a platter. The morbid slaughter of John the Baptist made Christ livid - I imagine it weakened him to the core. I dare say this horrible incident made for Christ being at his weakest ever. Herod, by default, had touched Christ at quick.
Two times before and after Christ's turn to those, who needed help on John's beheading, Christ needed the saving of solitude. Without time to himself-to bare his soul with his Father-he would be worthless to the crowds, a bore, a hollow shell of himself before those who knew him well.
Matthew 14:13, 23 NIV
When Jesus heard what had happened, he withdrew by boat privately to a solitary place. Hearing of this, the crowds followed him on foot from the towns. After he had dismissed them, he went up on a mountainside by himself to pray. Later that night, he was there alone,
There is no walking on water before there is solitude. There is no triumph or helping others before there is time alone to deal with our issues - time to be threadbare and broken before God and others as well, time we can get into the fetal position and near final breath find grace to reach beyond anger and disappointment to depending on God and the lifeblood others give.
As Christ later would break bread and feed thousands with 12 baskets left over, he thought of the broken body of his brother in arms, John. He also may have thought of his own body, which in time would be broken at the hands of those he called friends. The world for him was a unforgiving place - a place where the good were trampled on without a thought, where good deeds brought out ill will in others rather than their regard.
If we're to walk on water, we'll need to have the courage to face ourselves. Walking on water requires we walk through some gut-wrenching waters of difficulty. At times we'll find ourselves drowning in self despair and darkness. Our time away will be much more than a day. To walk back into the lives of others too quickly may sieve away at our ability to show deep compassion, which at best is empathy the we gather in the flood waters of difficulty.
Take time to be near drowning alone today. Cry, vent, plead. Be livid, afraid, distraught, helpless. It's the cry of life that prepares us to show compassion to those in need. If we're to short circuit our time needed for healing: we short circuit our ability to help others heal as well.
Take time to walk under water so that you can walk on water.
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